im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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