They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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