Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
