On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
