You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
