We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize