The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
