We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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