I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
