Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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