he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
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