And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
