First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
He felt like a one man threesome
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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