In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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