YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Randomize
