so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
