When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize