Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
