he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Someone came in the potted fern
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
