In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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