why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
two words...techno handjob
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Boobs speak an international language.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
