Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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