He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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