Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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