every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
why is half of my head shaved?
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