I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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