i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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