we're blogging at a bar
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize
