she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
