My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
