Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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