I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
