I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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