Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Define "chronic" masturbator.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
