just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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