And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
