they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
