My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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