i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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