white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
