Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
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