the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize