just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
As shirtless as possible
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
