he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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