my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I love you. Go after that dick
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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