...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
