He asked me if I "almost moaned"
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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