i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
