"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
He kissed a someone with a penis
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize
