dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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