he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
did you just send me my own nude
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
